“Hello, ladies.

My name is Will. Now look at me. Now look at your man. Now back at me. Now back at your man. Sadly, he is not me. BUT if you auditioned for this RP group, you could have me. Or get close to me. (And I believe we both understand what I mean when I say get “Close”). We could take pictures-whatever those are. If you’re into that. All you have to do is audition! And please, no strip teases. Save that for later…

Sincerely, 

Will.”